The problem with being a virgin….!!!


It’s being a while since I have written about my

journey, my journey of singleness! It’s an important

season and we should give it the credit it deserves.

I am writing on singleness because there has been

something I have been wrestling with. I have been

wrestling with the significance of my virginity in the scope

of singleness.

 

For ages we have been told to wait, “don’t have sex

before marriage.” That is all good advise and that is not

the issue. The issue I have is when we are told we will get

God’s best if we keep ourselves!!! “You will get God’s best

if you don’t have sex and don’t date until you find the One.”

Before I carry on I want to make something very clear.

I have kept myself, I am a virgin, I haven’t dated yet and

years ago that was my pride and glory! I held that up

to everyone and even to God. I was going to get the best

because I was pure, I kept myself! But I was wrong.

The advise we have been getting is incomplete.

As the years go by I realize more and more

that the woman God has for me will not be given to me

because of what I have done, but because of His grace.

She will be a gift!

I don’t want to get anything based on my

performance because the truth of the matter is I would

not get anything! God looks at the

heart and my heart is sinful. I may not have slept around

but I have sinned incredibly in my heart!!

 

To be honest with you, I don’t deserve God’s best. I have let

Him down so much. How can I stand before Him holding

up MY version of purity (filthy rags) and with pride say,

“God give me your best”….!!!! It doesn’t work like that!

Don’t get caught up in law (I kept myself so I want this

kind of woman or this kind of man)

God is looking at your heart. He wants to give you the

best because He loves you not because you did this or

did that.

 

But if you have kept yourself please understand that I am

not attacking you. I want you to see that God will give you

the best because that is the kind of God He is.  Look at what the word says,

 

For God has not called us to impurity but to consecration

[to dedicate ourselves to the most thorough purity].

1 Thessalonians 4:7

 

The word says we should DEDICATE ourselves! That is

such a strong word. We dedicate ourselves to purity

because we want to honor God in our hearts of hearts!

We dedicate ourselves to purity because we love Him

with every fiber of our being.

When David committed sexual sin with Bathsheba he

ran to God. His heart was torn at what he had done.

But it was never about “I am a man after God’s heart”!

He saw himself as a man under God’s grace. He fought

to stay humble in his own eyes.

Don’t get caught up in the law side of things. We don’t

deserve anything from God to be honest. All the “good”

we have done is like filthy rags.

 

If God has someone out there for me it will be because He

loves me. And on my wedding day the focus won’t be on how

many years I kept myself, or how I never dated and so on but

the focus will be on God’s amazing grace and love.

It will be about how much God loved me a sinful man that He still

went ahead and gave me His best even though I didn’t deserve it!

It will be a day of praise

to Him. A day where people give Him the glory…….

I will have nothing else to stand on but His goodness

and grace and that is the way it should always be!

 

For those of you who think you have sinned so much that

you don’t deserve God’s best know this:

God loves you. He is a good God and He wants you to run

to Him. He knows what you have done but He wants to you

to trust Him. He has someone special for you.

Don’t believe the lie that there is no one for you. The lie

that says you have sinned too much.

The lie that says God can’t forgive you.

Just know, there is hope for you!

He has a plan for you.

 

God is so good. I think about all He does for me and

I thank Him. I have nothing to say. I am speechless.

I simply wait for His gifts and blessing that I didn’t

deserve or orchestrate. I do have a part to play but it

will not take away from ALL that God does for me.

Be encouraged in your season of singleness. God is

with you in it.

Have a great weekend everyone!

 

Rolain

 

 

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