Where does your validation come from??


i-am-of-worth

As humans we crave applause, attention and acceptance.  We

want to be validated but how far will we go to get it?

As I talk about validation I really need to talk about self esteem

because in my eyes these two things are linked closely together.

When we esteem ourselves highly the less we look to man to

validate us.

 

One of my mentor’s described self esteem this way, self esteem

is your estimation of your own worth!

 

How much value do you place on yourself?

Do you esteem yourself highly?

 

People may have their own opinions about

you but you should value yourself highly. You should be your

biggest fan no matter what.

But what should your estimation be based off? What is your

measure?

The word of God should be your measure!

God knows the truth about you so seek out what He says about

you.

His word has so much amazing truths to declare to you about you….

 

Be real about your shortcomings but be wise how you approach

them. Tearing yourself down is probably doing more

damage than people’s negative  words to you!

 

So like I said, be honest with yourself. When you make a mistake

admit it but correct yourself in a way that still

maintains your value. I was really bad at doing this. I used to tear

myself down badly. I thought that was the right thing to do

but I was wrong. No matter how wrong I am God would NEVER

tear me down so why do I think it’s okay??

We all sin so it’s natural to speak negative. We don’t need to put

much effort into speaking and thinking

negatively. It’s hard to NOT speak negatively. It’s hard to NOT

gossip. It’s hard to NOT think negatively.

We have to be very intentional and deliberate about being positive

and encouraging and we need help!

 

We need affirmation, we need encouragement, we need support but

is that the main drive behind everything we do?

 

But when He was in Jerusalem during the Passover Feast, many

believed in His name [identified themselves with His party] after

seeing His signs (wonders, miracles) which He was doing.

But Jesus [for His part] did not trust Himself to them, because

He knew all [men];

And He did not need anyone to bear witness concerning man

[needed no evidence from anyone about men], for He Himself

knew what was in human nature. [He could read men’s hearts.]”

John 2:23-25

 

Jesus didn’t seek validation from man. He was content because

God validated Him!

 

“As soon as Jesus was baptized, He went up out of the water. 

At that moment heaven was opened, and he saw the Spirit of

God descending like a dove and alighting on Him. 

And a voice from heaven said, “This is my Son, whom I love;

with Him I am well pleased.”

Matthew 3:16, 17

What just happened there? Jesus was being validated!

He wasn’t looking for applause or encouragement from man,

He came to accomplish the mission He was given by God!

 

We need to be careful when it comes to who we look to for

validation.

Man never created you, God did so He is the only one qualified

to tell you who you really are.

Your best friend may know you better than the average person

but that doesn’t mean they know the real you.

It may be argued that your family knows you best but it’s just

not true. They know you better than anyone else but they still

don’t know the real you.

God is the only One who knows you in and out!

You can’t even trust your own assessment of who you really

are because once again, you didn’t create you, God did! So stop

with the “this is the way I am” statements because your

assessment is not 100% accurate.

 

Think about a house for a minute. Let’s say you are selling it.

It would be crazy asking a friend or random

stranger to tell you what the value of the house is. You have to go

to the real estate agency to get an accurate value.

Stop letting people tell you what your value is.

Today you have an opportunity to make a decision.

Just because someone sees you one way doesn’t mean that’s

who you are. (that’s really good news!!)

That’s the way they see you and not the way God sees you.

Because we are flawed we see in part. No one sees perfectly,

just God, remember that.

You don’t have to confine yourself to the perceptions of others.

You can break out of that.

You can decide to be the person God has created you to be. Let

Him show you who you really are. I believe there is so much to

still discover about ourselves. If we stop at, “this is the way I am” or

believe someone’s assessment of who we are then we limit

ourselves. If God really created us (which He did) surely there is

more right??

Surely there is more to us than what people see? !!!!

 

And on that note I will stop here.

If you are struggling with a low self esteem and you need to talk to someone click on the

link below.

 

https://www.betterhelp.com/advice/general/i-need-someone-to-talk-to-about-my-problems-but-where-do-i-turn/

 

Bless you friends!

 

Rolain

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What two men prayed…..


The Pharisee stood [ostentatiously] and began praying

to himself [in a self-righteous way, saying]:

God, I thank you that I am not like the rest of men –

swindlers, unjust (dishonest), adulterers – or even like

this tax collector. I fast twice a week; I pay tithes of all

that I get.

But the tax collector, [merely] standing at a distance, would

not even lift up his eyes to heaven, but kept striking his

breast, saying, O God, be favorable (be gracious, be

merciful) to me, the especially wicked sinner that I am!

Luke 18:12, 13 (AMP)

 

The year is about to end and as it does I want to touch

on a few things I think we need to reflect on before we get

into 2016. The word I am about to share has really been

on my mind for some time. This word brought attitudes

to light, attitudes that were not of God.

 

Just because you think you are humble doesn’t mean

you are humble. This is the kind of erroneous thinking

I had. But this scripture blew that out of the water.

I thought I was humble but truth be told, I was proud!

I couldn’t see it because my pride was cloaked in a

false sense of humility.

 

But to walk in the plan God has for us we need to be

humble! The tax collector was a perfect example of

what it meant to be humble.

I think humility is being able to stay small in our own eyes!

It’s having the wisdom to see that God is in control and

understanding that without Him we are lost.

Humility strips every selfish thought and idea we have.

Humility puts off our own strength and puts on God’s.

Humility doesn’t take pride in it’s own wisdom but

looks to the Lord for true wisdom!

 

The Pharisee stayed big in his own eyes. He saw himself

as more in his own eyes, as very important, while the tax collector

stayed small in his own eyes!

Who are you in your own eyes?

 

Please understand what the tax collector did and didn’t do.

He didn’t talk negatively about himself. He didn’t tell

God how useless and pathetic he was. He didn’t tear himself

down. That is not humility.

He knew he was a sinner in deep need of grace and mercy!

I hope you notice the difference. Stop the negative self talk.

It’s not biblical.

 

It’s so important we stay “small in our own eyes”.

Let us look at another passage of scripture that will help

us understand this truth:

 

Uzziah was sixteen years old when he became king, and

he reigned in Jerusalem fifty-two years. His mother’s

name was Jekoliah; she was from Jerusalem.

He did what was right in the eyes of the Lord, just as

his father Amaziah had done.

He sought God during the days of Zechariah, who instructed

him in the fear of God. As long as he sought the Lord, God

gave him success.

2 Chronicles 26:3

 

God had a plan for Uzziah. Actually, He had great plans for him.

Like Uzziah, God has great and amazing plans for us. But look

at how the story changed……

 

But after Uzziah became powerful, his pride led to his downfall.

He was unfaithful to the Lord his God, and entered the temple

of the Lord to burn incense on the altar of incense.

2 Chronicles 26:16

 

The priests were the only ones allowed to burn incense but

because Uzziah was proud (failed to remain small in his own

eyes) he never walked in the full promises of God!

God had made Uzziah powerful but he failed to realise

that.

When I start thinking I can’t do certain things because they are

beneath me or I am too important to do them

or if I think I should

only do certain things because I am important, that is a good

indicator I have become

proud. God wants me to walk in everything He has for me

but pride will destroy that very quickly!

 

Let us be like the tax collector. He remained small in his own eyes

and because of that the Bible says he went home justified!

 

My desire and prayer is that I walk in true humility, that

I stay small in my own eyes for the rest of my life!

Stay small in your own eyes!

God bless friends……

 

photo credit: google images

 

Rolain

O my soul……!


Why are you cast down, O my inner self?

And why should you moan over me and be

disquieted within me?

Hope in God and wait expectantly for Him,

for I shall yet praise Him, Who is the help

of my [sad] countenance, and my God.

Psalm 42:5

 

I can’t help but be encouraged as I read this

Psalm. It is clear the author is going through

stuff. But even as he goes through the “stuff”

he does something interesting. He begins to

talk to himself…..I think that is very interesting.

He doesn’t tear himself down, curse himself,

focus on how miserable and pathetic he is…No!

He encourages himself!!!!

He talks to his soul – “Put your hope in God!

Wow…..

 

There is a lesson to learn here. How do we speak

to ourselves? Especially when things are going bad?

It’s so easy to encourage yourself, and speak good

when everything is going well but what happens

when things get crazy??

 

It is said that the average human has 50 000 thoughts

running through his mind on a daily basis…..that is a huge

amount of thoughts right. How much of those thoughts

are positive, encouraging and uplifting???

Look at another verse with me:

 

Yes, my soul, find rest in God;

my hope comes from Him.

Psalm 62:5

 

What you say to yourself is very important.

Teach yourself to build yourself up.

Teach yourself to encourage yourself in the

Lord.

When everyone abandoned David, he encouraged

himself in the Lord! He didn’t beat himself up, or

tell himself how much of an idiot he was. He spoke

life over himself.

We need to speak to ourselves more often. We

need to speak more life. We need to speak the word

over ourselves. We need to encourage ourselves

to seek the Lord. We need to encourage ourselves

in the Lord.

Tearing yourself down doesn’t do you any good.

It actually makes things worse.

 

Think about something with me for a bit.

People trash talk themselves and tear themselves

down because they think they know who they are

right? There is no one who knows you better than

you. “I always forget things”, you say.

“That is exactly like me”

“I am so clumsy”

“I am horrible with faces”

 

But let me ask you something. Did you create

yourself? The answer would be no.

God is the One who created you and He is the

only One who knows who you really are. So why

do you speak to and about yourself like

you are the one who created yourself??? You

cannot trust your judgement about yourself.

We think we know ourselves but that is not true.

We may be way ahead than the closest people

in our lives but we still are not qualified to make

a final assessment about ourselves. We didn’t create

ourselves, God did. So before you tear yourself down

think about that. You don’t have all the information on

yourself so don’t be so quick to tell yourself who you

are. You are wonderfully and fearfully made….

Don’t forget that….

 

Rolain