Where does your validation come from??


i-am-of-worth

As humans we crave applause, attention and acceptance.  We

want to be validated but how far will we go to get it?

As I talk about validation I really need to talk about self esteem

because in my eyes these two things are linked closely together.

When we esteem ourselves highly the less we look to man to

validate us.

 

One of my mentor’s described self esteem this way, self esteem

is your estimation of your own worth!

 

How much value do you place on yourself?

Do you esteem yourself highly?

 

People may have their own opinions about

you but you should value yourself highly. You should be your

biggest fan no matter what.

But what should your estimation be based off? What is your

measure?

The word of God should be your measure!

God knows the truth about you so seek out what He says about

you.

His word has so much amazing truths to declare to you about you….

 

Be real about your shortcomings but be wise how you approach

them. Tearing yourself down is probably doing more

damage than people’s negative  words to you!

 

So like I said, be honest with yourself. When you make a mistake

admit it but correct yourself in a way that still

maintains your value. I was really bad at doing this. I used to tear

myself down badly. I thought that was the right thing to do

but I was wrong. No matter how wrong I am God would NEVER

tear me down so why do I think it’s okay??

We all sin so it’s natural to speak negative. We don’t need to put

much effort into speaking and thinking

negatively. It’s hard to NOT speak negatively. It’s hard to NOT

gossip. It’s hard to NOT think negatively.

We have to be very intentional and deliberate about being positive

and encouraging and we need help!

 

We need affirmation, we need encouragement, we need support but

is that the main drive behind everything we do?

 

But when He was in Jerusalem during the Passover Feast, many

believed in His name [identified themselves with His party] after

seeing His signs (wonders, miracles) which He was doing.

But Jesus [for His part] did not trust Himself to them, because

He knew all [men];

And He did not need anyone to bear witness concerning man

[needed no evidence from anyone about men], for He Himself

knew what was in human nature. [He could read men’s hearts.]”

John 2:23-25

 

Jesus didn’t seek validation from man. He was content because

God validated Him!

 

“As soon as Jesus was baptized, He went up out of the water. 

At that moment heaven was opened, and he saw the Spirit of

God descending like a dove and alighting on Him. 

And a voice from heaven said, “This is my Son, whom I love;

with Him I am well pleased.”

Matthew 3:16, 17

What just happened there? Jesus was being validated!

He wasn’t looking for applause or encouragement from man,

He came to accomplish the mission He was given by God!

 

We need to be careful when it comes to who we look to for

validation.

Man never created you, God did so He is the only one qualified

to tell you who you really are.

Your best friend may know you better than the average person

but that doesn’t mean they know the real you.

It may be argued that your family knows you best but it’s just

not true. They know you better than anyone else but they still

don’t know the real you.

God is the only One who knows you in and out!

You can’t even trust your own assessment of who you really

are because once again, you didn’t create you, God did! So stop

with the “this is the way I am” statements because your

assessment is not 100% accurate.

 

Think about a house for a minute. Let’s say you are selling it.

It would be crazy asking a friend or random

stranger to tell you what the value of the house is. You have to go

to the real estate agency to get an accurate value.

Stop letting people tell you what your value is.

Today you have an opportunity to make a decision.

Just because someone sees you one way doesn’t mean that’s

who you are. (that’s really good news!!)

That’s the way they see you and not the way God sees you.

Because we are flawed we see in part. No one sees perfectly,

just God, remember that.

You don’t have to confine yourself to the perceptions of others.

You can break out of that.

You can decide to be the person God has created you to be. Let

Him show you who you really are. I believe there is so much to

still discover about ourselves. If we stop at, “this is the way I am” or

believe someone’s assessment of who we are then we limit

ourselves. If God really created us (which He did) surely there is

more right??

Surely there is more to us than what people see? !!!!

 

And on that note I will stop here.

If you are struggling with a low self esteem and you need to talk to someone click on the

link below.

 

https://www.betterhelp.com/advice/general/i-need-someone-to-talk-to-about-my-problems-but-where-do-i-turn/

 

Bless you friends!

 

Rolain

Advertisements

Throw away that script!!


 

All his life he was abused. His dad was a drunk and his mom was having an affair, an affair that led to divorce! His school life suffered greatly! Who cared about science or geography when life was falling apart! His world as he knew it had been destroyed and was still a living nightmare and yet he was still required to engage at school!!! His teachers called him stupid, his seniors ridiculed him daily. He had no where to run but in himself but even that was hopeless because the person inside would tear him to bits, the person in him would tell him how pathetic he was……no one understood him not even his family….

His script.
I am a nobody and no one loves me! I am better off dead…..I am of no use on this earth! If there is a God, He really really hates me!!! No one understands me.
The boy grew up and for a lot of his life he held on to the script that had been given to him through experiences he went through as a child. He wanted nothing to do with his family, he was treated like trash but it never bugged him because his script said he was trash! He was poor but that was okay with it because his script said he was a nobody and he didn’t deserve anything good! He never expected love from anyone because his script said no one loved him and so it went until…..
Something happened, something that would change his life forever. The boy who was now a man found God or may I say, God found him! God changed the way he saw. God started showing him flaws in the script, not only flaws but lies and deception! It was a difficult time for the boy turned man. A lot of the lessons where painful. The crazy thing about the whole situation was there was a part of the man that wanted to hold on to the script!! It was what he knew and even though it was destroying him he held on to it and didn’t want to let go!
But God in His grace and love saved the man. After years and years of rebuilding and restructuring, and pounding and pain the man began to see something else. He began to see what God had for him…..He began to believe in love again! The script he once had was nothing but a memory now.
It would still come back to haunt him at times but by God’s grace he stood tall and strong knowing who his God was and is, knowing the plans God has for him, confident in the God who loves him!
This is what I would like to say to you. The script you have been given is false. God loves you and cares for you and has a plan for you. Your life can turn out differently despite what people are saying. Your life WILL turn out differently. God did not compose the script you are living by now not if it is a negative one and not if it undermines who are in Christ.
You are not destined to fail.
You are not a loser.
You are not ugly.
You are not useless.
You are not stupid.
You are not just a statistic.
You are not a burden.
You are not clumsy.
God has someone amazing out there for you.
You will succeed, you will win, you will prosper, you are loved, you have been forgiven, you are beautiful, you are rich, you are precious, you are important and so much more……
You don’t have to follow the script you have been given. God wants you to look to Him and trust Him. He wants to give you the best. The script is not true. Throw it away!
* Depression is real and needs to be taken seriously. If you want to understand it more and know how
to deal with it please click on the link below*
Rolain