The not so great side of Father’s Day!!


I have been online and reading some really inspiring comments about fathers. As I look back in my own personal life I see how I never looked forward to Father’s Day. It meant nothing to me. Father’s Day has been a harsh reminder of what I didn’t have.
– My father was a drunk and very abusive
– I don’t remember a time in my childhood when my father gave me a hug
– I don’t remember if my father ever encouraged me in anything
– I can’t remember if he ever told me he loved me. And because of that I don’t remember a time telling him I love him.
– I lived in fear of my dad for a big chunk of my life.

This is the kind of relationship I had with my dad. As I grew older I distanced my self from him. I never spoke to him because I was very bitter towards him. It was bad. But about a year ago after persistent prodding from the Holy Spirit I made a decision to pursue a relationship with my dad. Last year was a year of firsts for me.
– I told my dad I loved him and he  told me he loved me.
-We had our first conversation about life. It was actually about God and he gave his life to Christ. 🙂
– I sort of hugged my dad for the first time as far as I can remember!
– I started talking to my dad a lot more
– The bitterness and anger I had for my dad finally left last year.

I am not saying it’s easy and we are the best of friends but our relationship is a work in progress which is getting better all thanks to God.
But the truth is I am just one example in a very big big pool. There are a lot more stories of fatherless children! And a lot of the stories don’t have an ending like mine. A lot of the endings are tragic and sad. Just look at these stats

What is the conclusion then?

As a young man I am thinking about the future.  I don’t want to be a dad that is not there for his kids.

You may have had a bad example or NO example at all but that doesn’t have to be your story!!! You can be different. You can the dad that can make a difference in your family’s life. Don’t be discouraged you had a bad example. By God’s grace you will be the difference. If you are depressed and discouraged today please know there is hope for you! God has a plan for you and your family. He is going to use you to bring up your kids in the way of The Lord. Isn’t that exciting…….I am excited!!!!

Happy Fathers Day.

 

Rolain.

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21 thoughts on “The not so great side of Father’s Day!!

  1. God is a God of restoration. Glad you’re able to work on restoring a relationship with your Dad. Hopefully it will go well and praise be to God that your Dad asked Christ into his heart. Mine finally did 24 hours before he died at age 87. THAT”S God’s power! Blessings to you.

    • Wow Sue….that is God’s power indeed! What a testimony you have! That is so amazing to hear. Thanks for sharing that.
      I am praying my relationship with my dad will get better and better. Praying for him constantly helps…….
      I appreciate you sharing your testimony!
      Rolain

  2. Rolain, you had God the Father as your Role Model. You were able to take the first step of restoration in your relationship with your earthly father, just as He took the first step of restoration in His relationship with you. Praise God you had a year of many “firsts.” May this year be a year of many more.

    • Hi Susan.
      God has been a great role model. I don’t think I would of got here if He wasn’t with me and nudging me. There is still a long way to go but He is with me every step of the way. Thank you Susan.

  3. Thank you for sharing this perspective. I didn’t know those staggering statistics when I wrote my Father’s day post “We all have a Father In God” but I suspected as much. I am glad your relationship with your dad is better now. I pray that the fatherless know they have a Father in God.

    God bless you.

    Jennifer – I Give God All The Glory

    • Hi Jennifer
      The stats shocking and those aren’t even all the stats. Our generation is in trouble. We need more men who will stand and take up their responsibility as a father. There are so many young people who need a father figure in their life. I stand in agreement with your prayer and I also declare that more men will realize how important their role is as a father!! Thanks Jennifer and enjoy the rest of your week.
      Rolain

  4. Rolain! Yay, you! God is so faithful, isn’t He? I’m so thankful that He gave you the opportunity to mend what had been broken. And, I’m excited to see how God will now use your experiences to help other’s heal.

    • He has been so faithful Lisa. It has been a hard road but it’s getting better. God has really helped through this whole journey! He deserves the glory!

  5. Look how the Lord strengthened and taught you through this tough time. We all have choices to make, learning to forgive, one day at a time, is huge! Doing so allows you to be exactly what God intended. “By God’s grace you will be the difference.” Keep up the great work!

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